Singles - Having Trouble Finding A Partner? Get A Life!

Oh, we don't mean that in a mean way! Here's what we're talking about:

You're filling in your online dating profile. You're racking your brain to think of things to write about. 'I enjoy long walks.' Yes, we all do. What else? 'I'm looking for someone.' Well, duh, you're on a dating website! 'I love horses.' Do you even own one?

It can be quite a blow to your ego to sit down to write about your life and discover that you ran out of things to say in six sentences. Furthermore, that audience of strangers out there might find you a tad boring. Especially in the case of young people just starting out, you don't have much of a life going on to talk about yet. What you need to do is turn yourself into a fascinating person, with depth and broadness and stimulating things to talk about. Somebody who's too busy to hang out in a bar.

If your life seems a bit empty and you're having trouble finding a date, here's some suggestions on how to solve both of those problems in the same move:

1. Get a pet.

Of course, we aren't advocating using an animal just for a social accessory. But having a pet or two around gives you some dimension. A dog will get you outside in the fresh air, taking it for walks and giving you a chance for social contact. A cat will give you some companionship and a chance to post funny cat pictures in your profile. Even a goldfish, a hamster, or an exotic pet such as a reptile will at least give you something to talk about. It's also an encouraging sign to a prospective partner if you can show that you can at least support one other creature besides yourself.

2. Get a hobby.

Collecting is a good one. Collecting coins, stamps, postcards, comic books, dolls, or anything, really, gives you instant depth. You learn new things, you have something to be passionate about, you get out to shows and conventions that revolve around your hobby, and in at least most cases you have something of real value that makes a good investment.

3. Start a new career path.

We're not advocating just doing this for the sake of doing it. But you might ask if your career is making you unhappy, and if you'd rather be doing something else. You can also start a second career. This may be a simple move like going to college part-time or moonlighting a second hobby into an income stream. Here again, people who are happy in their work and make decent money are just a better dating prospect all around.

4. Join a social club.

The best kind are those that revolve around some game or pastime. Clubs are all over the world for chess, backgammon, rummy, bridge, Go, poker, and other competitive games. Or if you're interested in gardening, small investing, painting, or other wholesome activity with a wide following, there's usually a club for it.

5. Travel.

Travel broadens you. You get exposure to different cultures, discover new foods and things you didn't even know you liked, and you might even pick up a foreign language or two. At the very least, you're bound to run into an adventure or two that will give you a fun story to tell.

6. Volunteer!

Help the homeless, counsel runaways, deliver toys to needy children, rescue stray animals, or work at a shelter for battered women. The world always needs more people doing this anyway. You can also become an activist for a cause you believe in; campaign for an election, work to raise public awareness on an issue, or picket and protest something you believe is wrong. It will cost little to nothing for you, but will give you confidence that you can make a difference in this world, give you some broader social contact by socializing with your fellow volunteers, and best of all, it lets prospective partners know that you have a heart. Just don't be such a zealot about it that it puts people off.

There, now, doesn't this make sense? that's what we mean by 'Get a life!' If you had to pick between somebody who stays in their room all day watching the telly and someone who collects silver commemorative medals, keeps an iguana, has done a two-year stint in the Peace Corps in Zimbabwe, plays cribbage weekly with a group of friends, and is studying to be a portrait photographer... who would you find more interesting?